Insecurity in Relationships: Ways to Cope
by Admin
Posted on 29-09-2023 09:17 AM
Insecurity involves feeling inadequate, due to a lack of self-confidence. It can cause you to doubt your abilities, instincts, and relationships, making it difficult for you to believe in yourself and trust others. Insecurity can be a painful and difficult emotion to experience. It can take a toll on your mental health as well as your relationships.
This article explores the signs, causes, and consequences of insecurity in relationships and suggests strategies to help you cope.
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Insecurity consists primarily of fear. Because of that fear, most people avoid opportunities because they have an intense fear of failure. Their standards are overextended to the point their goals are not achievable. Even relationships are scary because mates might leave. It’s vital to pursue the opportunities and not allow fear to motivate. Related reading: how to cope with the fear of losing someone you.
Why do you struggle to feel secure in your relationship ? lack of emotional security usually comes from one of two places; yourself or your relationship. Sometimes, it’s a combination of the two. It might be that you have something in your past that makes it hard for you to feel secure in your relationship. This is often down to the beliefs and values you learned in childhood. Alternatively, it can be the result of a traumatic event that makes it difficult for you to trust others. If your insecurity comes from your past, you’ll probably feel insecure in many or all of your relationships.
When you trust and rely on yourself for comfort and support, you are no longer dependent on other people. That does not mean you cannot share your feelings with other people and seek reassurance and encouragement from them. It just means you can soothe your own distress without relying on other people to do that for you. This will empower you and allow you to communicate more effectively, thus improving the overall quality of your relationships. Learning to trust in your ability to cope and be happy on your own means having effective ways to manage your anxiety.
Causes of Insecurity in Relationships
You’ve likely met many people who struggle with insecurity. Most of the time, it’s a silent struggle. It’s common for everyone to feel a lack of self-confidence from time to time.
But if your inability to feel secure causes major stress in your life, you need to take action. If left unchecked, self-doubt can keep you from pursuing your goals, cause tension in relationships and lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms. Where does self-doubt come from? and why do so many people have trouble feeling secure with themselves?
one theory is that insecurities are formed during childhood when people experience negativity — whether negative ideas are directed at them or they observe caregivers expressing negative ideas about themselves.
One of the biggest mistakes people make with relationship insecurity is to assume that it’s all about their past—the way they were raised, the fact that one parent or the other didn’t love them enough, they never had good role models for healthy relationships, etc. Now, while your past does obviously have some influence on the quality of your relationships, that’s missing the forest for a handful of trees… it’s your habits in the present, not the events of your past, that cause you to feel insecure. For example: maybe you didn’t have the greatest role models for healthy relationships in the past.